My Church family <3
If only you knew what exactly you mean to me, maybe then my chances with you would be better so here goes… we have known each other for almost 17 years now and yet you still have been such an amazing guy! I love how we can talk about anything and everything that goes on in our daily life. I love how we can text and still keep the conversation going :) You make me smile a lot and I love how you remember the details in my life that are important. Even though it took us a couple of years to get close again in the end it is totally worth it. I love how we can understand each other and what we have both been through. Though I have not been through the same things as you went through at least I am here to understand it and not be one of those kinds of people that judge you just from hearing about your past. Like I tell most people what’s in the past belongs in the past. You are now part of my present time and which I hope you will still be part of my future. A simple text from you goes a long way, just the fact that you text me back shows that you care. I love how I can be myself around you and tell you what is on my mind. I love how you tell me your secrets and I return the favor. I love how we met at school and at church and since then we have been friends. I sometimes wish that we were more than friends, hopefully this time around it could happen. ;-)
Why does this always seem to happen, right when I have the chance to make things happen you somehow end up getting in the middle and screw it up for me. I thought that I could handle just being friends with you even considering you to be my best friend but were have I gone wrong? All I have done for you is be the best friend any person can ask for and all I want in return is for you to be the friend I have asked for many times. We worked on our friendship and seriously I thought that this whole being best friends could work. I thought I could trust you and believe in the fact that you won’t screw things up. Have you decided to change your mind all cause of that other girl??? I’m trying my best to be friends with your friends but some how it seems like it could be hard. I’m friends with your close friends and I hope you are happy with that. What do I have to do? I didn’t think that you would want to be part of the work today but then you were. Along with two others that I was not sure was going to be around. I tried to stay calm but you could see it in my eyes that I was not fine and that deep down I was freaking out. I do so much for you and the least you could do was to take a step back and notice that I am not a person to play with or to mess with m emotions. I was so excited to see this certain person who happens to be your friend, and yet you had to be around. I love you like a friend and all but why!!!! Is it so much to ask to just give me some alone time. I give you all the freaking alone time that you need, I text you when you are not with that girl, but with me noooo you just like to get in my way. My question now is….should I be your friend? Should we talk more and make things clear??? Why do I even let you get in my way??? I want to know why are you doing this to me?
Today was supposed to be a nice and relaxing day while I was helping a friend out, but everything took for a turn. I hope next time it will be better that is if there is a next time. Ahhh here goes nothing I am going to try and fix things with the other guy.
LAWD HAVE MERCY